Maternal instinct
by D.B.Adams

She stared at the baby, it was perfect. Jenny's blue eyes looked straight into he baby's black ones, she could hardly believe it, after waiting so long. And it was perfect, it's tiny hands and feet, with their perfect tiny nails. It's perfect tiny white teeth that flashed when it smiled.
After all this time, after all the waiting, at last she was staring at the baby in her arms, a baby she could call her own.

They, that is Hugh and Jenny had tried for so long to have a baby, tried till the pleasure had gone out of trying. Then had come the endless tests, Jenny knew the inside of the hospital better than any mother she'd ever met. After the test the unsuccessful ' In Vitro ', and the pain, both physical and mental that it had caused.
Then the attempts to adopt, more tests; means, suitability, psychological. In the end it this proved to be too much for Hugh. The strain that their marriage had been under for some time took its toll. Cracks that had been under the emotional surface for a while finally opened into a deep, wide chasm.

Hugh had rediscovered the pleasure of making love, only it had been with that little slut at the office. However every cloud has a silver lining and the divorce had paved the way for this moment. When Jenny eventually got the money from the settlement, the 'Agency' had been able to set this up.

The Baby started to cry again, nuzzling it's face into Jenny's breast. "There, there my love, you'll not find anything for you there" she said picking up a bottle and inserting the rubber teat into the baby's mouth.

The 'Agency', that's what Mr Renfeld called it, even though it comprised of just him, a desk an answerphone and some filing cabinets in a dingy back room above a launderette.
" You must excuse the decoration" he said, in a voice dripping with insincerity and clipped with a slight accent "but we have only just moved in".
" Now I can see from the form and your letter, the problems that face you, but you must take heart, they are not insurmountable".
He paused and stared at Jenny in a way that made her feel most uncomfortable. She shifted in her seat and stared back at the hairs that jutted from his nostrils, neither helped.
He added " Nor will they be inexpensive".
She nodded.
He went on "You will have seen in the news these terrible and bloody wars in Eastern Europe. Terrible, terrible and they produce many orphans, not all of them babies ofcourse." He paused "But if you are sure it is a baby you want it can be arranged".
Jenny nodded again, then said clearly " I want a baby".
" Yes, ofcourse" Renfeld smiled "Now I am not a greedy or callous man, but you must understand that the expensive involved in this kind of arrangement are considerable".
He lent forward " I will need some money up front and I need proof that you can afford the full amount, because once the wheel are set in motion, they cannot be stopped".
Jenny sat and quietly agreed to everything, then got on to her bank and arranged to take out £5000 in cash.

And now just over a month later, here she was in this small hotel room in Amsterdam. The adoption papers in her suitcase and the baby in her arms crying.
She, for the baby was a girl, was probably hungry, Jenny thought, upset and confused.
The hand over had been brusque to say the least. A man had brought the baby, he had a dark complexion and black hair. He wore a brown jacket and brown trousers that did not match, a dark blue jumper, light blue shirt, no tie, a black cap and black shoes.
He had the baby in a battered old carrycot which he placed on the bed, he lifted out the baby and handed it to Jenny.
" Its girl" he said, his accent thick eastern european.
"Has she got a name?" asked Jenny, staring into the baby's deep black eyes.
"Its girl" he said again "Money"
Jenny hardly looked away from the baby's face as she reached inside her handbag and produced an envelope. The man took it from her and opened it.
"Where is she from?" she asked still staring at her baby - Her baby.
" Karpatia" the man, who was busy counting the money, said quietly.
"Where?"
"Romania" a click punctuated the end of the word, like an ominous full stop. Jenny looked up to find the man and the carrycot gone, the muffled sound of footsteps fading behind the closed door. Jenny looked back down at the baby.

" Just me and you now girl" she said trying once more to insert the rubber teat between it's lips. But the baby was not interested in the bottle, it pushed the teat aside and began to nuzzle Jenny's breast once more. Perhaps she is not hungry after all, perhaps it is just the comfort she needs, Jenny thought.
Almost without thinking she undid the buttons of her blouse and pushed the bra cup up over her breast. The baby found the nipple immediately, attaching itself like a tic.
Jenny sat up straight, suddenly her whole body went rigid as a board. The shock was immense and the pain excruciating as the baby's tiny needle sharp teeth pierced the soft skin of her breast. Inside Jenny screamed, she would have screamed out loud, had the shock not taken her breath away completely.

Then just as suddenly Jenny relaxed, her whole body filled with a sense of well being and love - above all love. As the baby began to feed, Jenny smiled down at it.
"There, there, I'll look after you" she said "You're my baby now, and nothing is too good for my little girl".
The baby gurgled and looked up with it's deep black eyes, as Jenny carefully wiped away some drops of blood that escaped from the corner of it's mouth.

copyright D.B.Adams 1999